Description: In this episode, Kelli interviews online marketer, podcaster, and brand new author, Jenna Kutcher. This past month in the Finally Fearless book club, we read her book, How Are You Really and this is a book club style interview with great questions, tons of insight, and amazing conversation.
Let’s dive in!
Jenna’s massage therapist told her to write her book. At the end of her massage she told Jenna that there was something she needed to do that she was resisting doing. Jenna knew immediately that it was that she needed to write this book. The massage therapist said, “I need you to go out and do it. You are resisting it. You’re turning your hips away from the path that you should be on.”
It was crazy because she didn’t say, “Hey, you need to go write a book.”
It was like, yeah, there is something you need to do. And you are resisting creating it.
So, even a highly confident person like Jenna Kutcher, needed someone to remind her that there is something she needed to do and like her you already know what it is and you to just go do it.
If we want to live full lives, we have to feel our feelings. Which means we have to learn to sit with ourselves, to sit with whatever it is that we’re feeling, let that feeling pass and then move in the direction we want go.
Our shared feelings are what connect us. Like we’re not meant to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. Those shoes don’t fit us. But while we can’t always relate to someone’s experience, we’ve felt those shared feelings. It’s important to recognize that every human has these shared experiences through feelings, we can relate to and have a way deeper empathy that I think allows us to like cross way deeper waters with each other.
It’s so important that we reconnect with the voice that is always in us. It’s been here. We have just drowned it out. A lot of us grew up watching Disney movies and its no wonder that women are just waiting for someone to hand them their big break. In all of the movies, the women are rescued, they’re literally just standing there, looking good waiting for somebody to sweep them away.
Learning to listen to your inner voice and get clear about the things you want is so important. In fact, Jenna genuinely attributes her success to listening to all the ideas, receiving all the invitations and then pausing and saying, “Hey, what do I know to be true? Or like, what do I say is important to me? Is this aligned?”
The next part is actually taking action. I think in today’s world, there are so many things that are not right. No matter what side of anything you’re on. And yet a lot of times we’re just waiting for other people to step in and to make it right. When really there is this invitation for us to like, be bold in that direction, whatever that looks like for us.
Jenna shares about hitting a big goal and said she remembers just like checking in with herself and being like, “how do I feel right now? And like, I was burned to a crisp, like mm-hmm if I was being honest, I was so exhausted. I felt like I was a shell of a human being. I felt like I was just a workforce. I was always on. I had hit burnout.“
Since that point she has begun to implement more boundaries into her life. Contrary to popular belief, boundaries don’t keep things out of your life, they keep you in your life. One big boundary that Jenna now uses is that she doesn’t commit to anything on the spot. She offers herself a pause and it’s made all the difference. Another tip has been to create tools to support her in being able to say NO, without guilt.
A question you should be asking yourself is: What does it mean to be successful. And being able to define that for yourself. Success is going to be different for every person, and it’s going to look and feel different during different seasons of your life.
In order to stay creative, you have to have two things, safety and security. If you can figure out what point of money, time, resources, energy you have, where you feel safe and secure, that is where you draw the line in the sand, that is your enough point and it’s gonna look different for everyone.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I’m honored and excited to be on this journey toward personal growth and greater confidence with you. If you enjoyed the podcast, I’d love to ask you to take 2 minutes to leave me a 5-star review on your podcast app, that way we can help even more women to join us as we #dropkickyourinnermenagirl together.
P.S. If you’re looking for ways to increase your confidence and silence your inner mean-girl, download my free workbook, 6 Ways to Dropkick Your Inner Mean Girl.