103. Love Your Kids Without Losing Yourself with Dr. Morgan Cutlip


Today, I’m thrilled to share the amazing conversation we had in our Finally Fearless Book Club last month with the fantastic Dr. Morgan Cutlip. We dived deep into the world of motherhood, guilt, and those impossible standards we often set for ourselves. Dr. Cutlip’s insights are incredibly valuable and relatable, and I’m excited to bring you some key takeaways from our chat.

*side note: not in the book club yet? Join today, it’s completely free and a totally awesome time!

In This Episode:

Understanding Mom Guilt

Dr. Cutlip begins by shedding light on the two types of guilt that moms often experience. The first is helpful guilt, which prompts us to take action when we recognize we’ve strayed from our values or standards. It’s like our inner compass guiding us toward positive changes.

The second, undeserved guilt, is a different beast altogether. This one is born from impossible standards, often societal pressures, and unrealistic expectations we put on ourselves. It’s essential to identify these standards and challenge them, as they can lead to unnecessary stress and burnout.

Managing Guilt

So, how can we manage guilt effectively? Dr. Cutlip shares a fantastic framework:

  • Define Your Standards: Start by identifying your expectations for yourself. What does a “good mom” mean to you? Put it all on the table.
  • Challenge Unrealistic Standards: Take a good look at your standards and question them. How would you reassure a friend with these standards? Sometimes, it helps to challenge and reframe them.
  • Create a One-Line Mantra: Craft a simple, empowering mantra that reminds you of your new beliefs and helps you stay centered when guilt creeps in.
  • Make Behavioral Changes: Don’t wait for the feelings to change; adjust your actions to align with your new belief system. This is where the magic happens.

Not Guilting Your Children

As parents, we’ve all been there—using guilt as a go-to when we feel helpless or overwhelmed. Dr. Cutlip provides a critical insight: guilting your children often arises from fear, helplessness, or unrealistic expectations. The solution? Recognize these emotions and choose a more effective response, as guilting children can create distance in the parent-child relationship.

Letting Go of Impossible Standards

In our society, there’s a persistent pressure to live up to the Pinterest-perfect mom image. But Dr. Cutlip reminds us that we’re in control of our standards. Define and reevaluate them to align with your values and let go of those that are unrealistic or detrimental to your well-being.

Sharing and Seeking Support

One of the most powerful tools for banishing mom guilt is talking to other moms. Share your experiences and challenges with one another. You’ll soon realize that you’re not alone and that many others are grappling with the same issues and concerns. This can provide the support and reassurance needed to ease the guilt.

What’s Next for Dr. Cutlip?

Dr. Cutlip isn’t slowing down anytime soon! She’s currently working on her second book, focused on the ever-pressing topic of the mental load in motherhood. This book aims to provide insights and practical advice to help mothers manage the mental load more effectively.

You can find Dr. Morgan Cutlip on Instagram (@DrMorganCutlip) and access free resources related to her book and courses on her website (drmorgancutlip.com).

So there you have it, the fabulous Dr. Morgan Cutlip provided us with a treasure trove of insights and guidance on banishing mom guilt, nurturing ourselves, and reevaluating those unrealistic standards. It’s all about taking control and crafting a motherhood experience that works for you.

Thank you for joining me today, and remember, you’re an incredible mom just the way you are. Let’s lift each other up, banish that guilt, and create a community of support and love.

Until next time, take care, and remember to give yourself permission for a little daytime TV and a well-deserved nap! 😄

Before you go!


Thank you so much for listening to this episode! I’m honored and excited to be on this journey toward personal growth and greater confidence with you. If you enjoyed the podcast, I’d love to ask you to take 2 minutes to leave me a 5-star review on your podcast app, that way we can help even more women to join us as we #dropkickyourinnermeangirl together.

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